Restaurant Humiliation

Well, another year of (almost) dodging the bullet! Joe's Crab Shack is an awesome place to take somebody for their birthday. As long as it's not your birthday! This is a fun, happening kind of place. Fun music, interesting decorations all over the walls and ceilings, a party atmosphere—you name it! Every so often the staff stops working and turns up some loud disco tunes and dance for everyone's entertainment. Every so often they announce another birthday sucker!

Yep. The birthday sucker. Some poor schmo who got suckered into the restaurant with the promise of great drinks and tasty crab legs. Someone whose friends or family want to have a good laugh at their expense! Someone...well, someone like me! Matt promised me if we went he wouldn't tell them it was my birthday. I really wanted those tasty crab legs! Oh, those crab legs are so gooooood! And there is the most wonderful view of the boats in Newport harbor. Gorgeous sunset view. And mmmmm...did I mention the tasty crab legs!? I trusted my darling husband to keep our dirty little secret!

Apparently Matt forgot his promise about the secret birthday thing and the first thing he did was tell the waitress: "It's Lianna's Birthday" YIKES! Did he really just say that!? "Honey, you promised you wouldn't tell--oh, I don't want them to do that to me!" As we were discussing the matter over some delicious crab ball appetizers (ohmigoodness—try the crab ball appetizers—they are divine!) the first birthday sucker got her just deserts! They dressed her in a knight's outfit, complete with helmet, cape and a sword. She had to gallop a fake pony through the restaurant while the entire restaurant sang the birthday song!

Now, I'm a good sport who's willing to do silly things and be the butt of everyone's joke, but it's my birthday, for gosh-sake! I figure I need a little break on my birthday! I had already spent a good part of my day wearing a tiara and sparkly lei for the enjoyment of my co-workers! This was supposed to be a nice dinner with my husband. You remember—sunset...boats...tasty crab legs.

The next time the waitress stopped by, he told the waitress that I didn't really want to be in the spotlight. "Oh, no problem!" she said. Whew! Now I could relax and enjoy my main course! My husband was definitely a hero, now. Then he told me the reason he called off the public humiliation: He didn't have the camera with him! Oh, goodness—I am soooo glad he didn't bring the camera! While we enjoyed the crab (I got the Garlic King Crab Legs and he got the BBQ flavored ones) we watched several other birthday revelers. An 18-year old who got to wear a wig and ladies sweater had to tour the restaurant with a walker. A young girl dressed up like a superhero with a mask and had to skip her way around. Oh, I was positively giddy as I sang for each person to wish them a happy day!

Then came the pie. What delicious birthday meal is complete without a piece of Key Lime Pie. Mmmmm—pure heaven! I LOVE Key Lime Pie! So while I was innocently eating my pie, the servers came to give me my turn at the birthday festivities. GULP. (But you promised I was to have none of this!) Luckily, they took pity on this sour old lady and only sang for me! The whole restaurant sang for me. The staff sang the birthday song backwards, if you can believe it! (This is something you should definitely see at least once in your life.) So as I was feeling every eye upon me and almost regretting my love for crab, at least the servers made me laugh to ease the pain of being the birthday girl. And they didn't make me march around the restaurant dressed like Little Red Riding Hood or some such tom-foolery. And now I have another year to go before I have to dodge the bullet of restaurant humiliation again.